Wednesday, March 28, 2007


Misery doesn't love company, it loves equality. 'Cause if you're as miserable as I am, we're equal. Welcome to the fucking party.

Monday, March 26, 2007


So consider that you're an all powerful deity laying down the law for your subjects. Now then consider that one group, or 'tribe' of these subjects decides to try and negotiate with you. You're all fucking powerful, you don't need to negotiate, but still you're kind of amused, so you figure, whe the heck, and decide to sit down at the table with them.

Eventually what you get is a whole set of people with 8 nights of celebration instead of 1 Christmas day. And Yom Kippur. One freakin' day of fasting to atone all your sins for the year. Catholics get 40 days of Lent and only 1 day of Christmas celebration and Jews get eight nights of partying for only one day of atonement. We (and I mean this loosely as 'anyone who needs to bargain with the man' can learn a lot from the Jews. The next time I need to get my salary or contract negotiated I'm totally get a Jew to do it.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

If my last name was White

I'd name my kid Ford. Specifically Ford Bonco White. Just so that in classes and on IRS forms they'd read it as White, Ford Bronco.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Foreign Dependency

Much has been said lately about the US and foreign oil dependency. While I think it's an issue related to our continued involvement in the Middle East, I have to argue that our greater foreign dependency is to Colombia. While we would have a difficult time running on limited foreign oil, it would be impossible for the US economy, indeed any US business outside of Salt Lake City, to function without the influx of foreign coffee. Typically I'm picky, and I have a good supply of pure 100% Kona coffee, but across the nation, businesses and individuals function on their daily intake of caffeine. Starbucks, with an annual gross higher than most third world nations, is built entirely upon dependence on foreign coffee. Until we can remedy this risk to our national and economic security, we have to consider leaving on the table the invasion of South America. If only for our national security, Colombia may indeed be, the fifty-first state.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

What's your sign?

Someone sent this to me recently. It's supposed to be an "accurate" description of me based on horoscope...I'd like to respond.

The Virgin - not quite but certainly lately.

Dominant in relationships - usually not

Sexy - about as much as a mantee could be i suppose

Someone loves them right now - yeah the fucking IRS really loves me right now. Assholes are raping me this year.

Freak in bed - damn skippy.

Always wants the last word - WORD.

Caring - sure why not.

Smart - not if i can help it.

Intellectual - see above.

Attractive - perhaps if you're blind?

Loud - more angry than loud.

Loyal - to a fault. Even when the crazy bitch was cheating on me.

Easy to talk to - wish I wasn't 'cause honestly, do you really think I give a shit?.

Hard to forget... - even though you wish you could.

Love at first sight - unless you're blind....

Everything you ever wanted - if you wanted very little.

Easy to please - are you shitting me? not a chance. Well, second though, that one's true. It's call whiskey.

The one and only - lets hope.

Ultimate sexiness - you know it bitch.