Saturday, November 19, 2016

...or maybe President Grabber?

My job’s not great. I mean it’s tolerable, whatever. But the job I really want is to be the guy at the Secret Service who comes up with the codenames. Like Bill Clinton was Eagle. I recall seeing that Mike Pence is Hoosier, which is wholly uninspired. Imagine you’re the President and they guy jogging beside your car has to call you “Pumpkin” or you’re a senior counselor and the guy standing in front of the door whispers into his wrist “Noodle to see POTUS.” And it's not like you really have a say in what you get assigned. You might have heavily armed guards calling you "Sparky", nothing you could do about it. Although now i kind of want pasta for breakfast.


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