thought of the day 2009 09 01 - Jeremy

Living in my apartment with me, somewhere, is a noisy gecko that I named Jeremy. After the character from the cartoon Zits. I mention this because I like to consider him a friendly gecko. I figure he's responsible for keeping the bug population under control here. I rarely see roaches, and not just because I'm blind as fuck; and though I recently saw a centipede the size of a Dune sandworm, quite frankly I can't blame him for that one. I'm way bigger than he is and I didn't want to approach the thing (except to crush it beneath a bath math). Let me tell you, that was a hell of a way to wake up in the morning. If I wasn't crazy fucking tired and not completely awake yet, I probably would have been way more freaked out. I think I'm actually more disturbed by the centipede now than I was a few days ago when I saw the centipede.

I mention this because it's summer, and it's hot, and when I sleep I don't fall when it's still kind of warm, maybe surf shorts, winter I'll wear longer scrubs type pants or even pajama's but summer, half the time it's so fucking hot in my apartment, I'll sleep naked and still feel like i'm living in something an Arizona prison warden might call "the box."

Now to be fair, I've given this gecko the name Jeremy which assumes that it's a he. I don't know that for sure. I haven't inspected that. So now, just this morning I woke up to the sound of Jeremy chirping. He makes this weird chirping noise and has really odd sleep habits. Anyway, since a few days ago when I saw that centipede any time I wake up and something surprises me, I immediately freak out a little bit. Like I wake up and smell coffee and go, "hey, wait a minute, I didn't make coffee, somebody broke into my place in the middle of the night and made me a pot of coffee. Damn." Then a little more consciousness dawns on me and I relax a bit like, "oh, no, that's right, I passed out in the alley behind the Starbucks last night."

That same kind of thing happened with Jeremy this morning, where I'm sleeping and it's too hot so I'm not wearing anything and I wake up and suddenly I'm afraid a gecko is going to sneak up on me while I sleep and bite my cock.

------Okay, see that, that was like a Dane Cook joke, It took way too long, meandered down a couple of small side jokes like some white guy trying to map out the Amazon river tributaries and in the end it was, at best, like half a chuckle.