Water Landing

In case of a "water landing"? Really, "water landing" water is a liquid, this plane is a solid. This is not some Monty Python skit where we can compare things to the weight of a duck, this is an aluminum can without pontoons. You don't make a water landing in something like this. And while I grant you that water can freeze into ice and in theory you can land on ice that's thick enough, this is Hawaii, the only ice we have comes from the freezer and goes into the pilots drink.

What you really mean is 'crash' and in the event of a crash I'm going to ditch the seat cushion and use the fat bastard next to me as a flotation device.