Airplane Safety

So I flew to Maui last week and on the way over I was in one of the emergency exit rows. Figured I might as well go through the safety card since I forgot all my reading material and MP3 player in my baggage. You know waht I noticed? The people in those safety cards are way too calm for people that are about to die in a horrible plane crash. The lady putting on the life vest looks pretty fucking mellow for someone about to drown, the guy lifting the exit door is, well okay, first he's just promoting a sterotype that only a guy can lift a door even though the Samoan chick sitting next to me probably could have punched the fucking door off the plane and thrown my fat ass out of the exit, but more than that, the guy lifting he door is pretty fucking composed for someone who just had to assume the crash position.

I'd like to see them draw the cards like real people would look. Some guy doubled over in his seat, weeping like a little bitch while breathing into the mask thing. Or some lady getting thrown overboard because the heels on her shoes punctured the life raft, shit like that.