Monday, December 15, 2008


So I was watching one of the Resident Evil DVD's this weekend. Two things. 1) Mila Jovovich is still hot. Not necessarily orange hair and white straps in The Fifth Element hot, but still...

Second, and more importantly, I don't understand zombies. I mean vampires I get. They drink blood, the blood keeps them immortal. I get that. I mean I still wonder what would happen if they didn't drink blood. They're dead right, so what are you going to do, starve to life? But whatever, conceptually I get it. Drink blood, live forever. But zombies don't make sense. They go after brains, but when they eat the brains they don't get any smarter. Like if a zombie could eat brains and gain the collective intelligence of all the people they ate the brains of that would be fucking scary. You have a bunch of the undead walking around with the intelligence to make ray guns and shit. But as it stands, they're slow, they're only effective en mass and they're fucking easy to kill. What's the point? It's like being the kid on the short bus who so badly aspires to be the cripple in the speical olympics that he chops his own leg off. I mean really, what's the fucking point? Zombies aren't scary, they're just kinda lame.


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