Hearts and Minds, Literally?
Do you think that when the President talks about the battle for the hearts and minds of Iraqis he means it literally? I mean, I thought it was a metaphor or something, but considering the way things are going. I'm not so sure anymore. We've got people beling blow up and people blowing themselves up and other people getting tortured. It's getting to the point that I'm starting to believe that the President quite literally means he wants to take the hearts and the minds of Iraqis and put them in a fucking jar or something. Like start a collection maybe.
I mean hell, Dick Cheney already eats puppies so is it that much of a stretch to think that Bush 2 would really be wanting someones heart? I know it sounds grotesque, but think about it for a second. It's not like he has a mind of his own. So he certainly could use a few and it's not like the Iraqis are dumb. Shit, they outsmarted him. Well okay bad example, a retarded chimp could outsmart him, but you get the point. I'm sure at some point Condi "my name sounds like bad Puerto Rican food" Rice told him that we were waging a battle for "hearts and minds" and I'm sure she meant it metaphorically, but I'm not so sure that GW took it that way. I'm pretty sure at this point that his goal is oil and a wall full of Iraqi hearts in jars.
And the whole thing of course is an obvious Wizard of Oz joke with GW as the scarecrow biking down the yellow brick road singing "If I only had a brain," right before he smacks into another tree. And Cheney follows him dressed as a tin man going to see the wizard to get a heart. Which I suppose makes Rumsfeld the Lion. I don't have a joke here, I just think he's a pussy. And Condi is the obvious Dorothy. And none of that racist shit because right after Colin Powell and Clarence Thomas, and maybe Bill Cosby, she's like the whitest black person on the face of the earth.
So yeah, basically the entire Bush presidency is a bad re-enactment of the Wizard of Oz on LSD, in slow motion...way way way too fucking slow motion. Eight years slow motion. Jesus fuck I wish I could just remain drunk for eight years and wake up with a massive hangover when we either have a black guy or the Clinton with the bigger balls in office.
I mean hell, Dick Cheney already eats puppies so is it that much of a stretch to think that Bush 2 would really be wanting someones heart? I know it sounds grotesque, but think about it for a second. It's not like he has a mind of his own. So he certainly could use a few and it's not like the Iraqis are dumb. Shit, they outsmarted him. Well okay bad example, a retarded chimp could outsmart him, but you get the point. I'm sure at some point Condi "my name sounds like bad Puerto Rican food" Rice told him that we were waging a battle for "hearts and minds" and I'm sure she meant it metaphorically, but I'm not so sure that GW took it that way. I'm pretty sure at this point that his goal is oil and a wall full of Iraqi hearts in jars.
And the whole thing of course is an obvious Wizard of Oz joke with GW as the scarecrow biking down the yellow brick road singing "If I only had a brain," right before he smacks into another tree. And Cheney follows him dressed as a tin man going to see the wizard to get a heart. Which I suppose makes Rumsfeld the Lion. I don't have a joke here, I just think he's a pussy. And Condi is the obvious Dorothy. And none of that racist shit because right after Colin Powell and Clarence Thomas, and maybe Bill Cosby, she's like the whitest black person on the face of the earth.
So yeah, basically the entire Bush presidency is a bad re-enactment of the Wizard of Oz on LSD, in slow motion...way way way too fucking slow motion. Eight years slow motion. Jesus fuck I wish I could just remain drunk for eight years and wake up with a massive hangover when we either have a black guy or the Clinton with the bigger balls in office.
posted by rpalmeira at 11:01 PM
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