Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Ran out NyQuil

I ran out of the NyQuil, so I stopped by Wal-Mart on the way home.  Happened to notice that I could pay like $9 for the gelcaps with day and night or I could buy the generic stuff, same active ingredients in the same amounts. I’d have to buy like four of them to get the same number of gelcaps since they came in smaller packages, but even with that it was like half the price. Same drugs and I don’t hold stock in Vicks so I don’t really give a shit as long as it works.

On a whim I walked past the clearance section wondering if maybe they had some on clearance. They didn’t but they DID have condoms on clearance. I’ve never held a retail job so I could be wrong but it’s my understanding that most of the clearance items are either discontinued or maybe have some damaged packaging or something. I’m fine with a dinged up box or a dented NyQuil bottle if it’ll save me a buck, but I have my doubts on clearance condoms.

According to the US Dept. of Agriculture, it costs something like $241,000 to raise a child to the age of 18 in the United States. I don’t know why that falls under agricultural purview, if we could just plant kids and occasionally water them things would be much easier, but whatever, it’s $241,000 plus college and a lifetime of emotional extortion.

Is that really what you want to risk on clearance condoms? I’m okay maybe dealing with a mild cough for an extra day to save a few bucks I guess, but mentally weighing the risk of Wal-Mart clearance saves vs kids. Not so much. Like on the one hand kids, but on the other hand I can save $2.73. What’s the internal monologue like on that “I mean no, we don’t want kids, but it’s still $2.73. I could get these and save enough to get that latte.”

There are only two justifications I can think of for taking that chance. First, “we don’t want kids, but we don’t really care that much.” Or 2) lubricated, ribbed water balloons.

Either way, I tried to buy 6 of the little packets of generic gelcaps to get the same amount of gelcaps as in the bigger multi-pack. They would only sell me 3. I guess because they don't people making meth or whatever. Which doesn't make much fucking sense to me because I could have gotten 3 of the multi-packs with a shit ton more gelcaps overall and that would have been fine. So in Wal-Mart logic, you can make meth, just not the cheap generic meth. 


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