Thursday, June 28, 2012


In every zombie apocalypse you have zombies eating a bunch of people, but you never see the zombies get fat or poop. I mean I get that brains aren't really a high fiber food, but even zombies have to stay regular right?

Are they bulimic? Or maybe part of being a zombie is just having a giant tapeworm? Seems to me that might be something that fat lazy Americans would be interested in. Fuck Atkins, all you have to do is eat brains and you'll never get bigger. And you can withstand massive wounds to the torso. Granted, your fear of fire will probably force you to give up grilling in the summer, but that's a minor trade off for keeping the pounds off right?


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