Saturday, April 29, 2017


Stealing jobs is not a real thing. Nobody has ever been held at gunpoint and told to just stand there while some other guy does their TPS reports for them. I have never heard of an HR manager being held hostage with a bomb vest over an entry level receptionist gig. At best, you get people who embellish a CV, or put down skills like “fluent in German” that they’re never actually going to be asked to use. That’s misdemeanor fraud of jobs at best, not grand theft occupation. Stealing is like if you’re out with your friends and you leave your job on the counter while you use the bathroom and suddenly that douche in the hoodie, in the corner is typing up your marketing slide deck that’s due on Tuesday. Has that EVER happened? Have you ever just been walking down the street and some guy pulls out a knife and says “give me your job!”? Fuck no. He’ll say “give me your money” but all you have to do is pull out a business card and go “that’s not a job, this is a job!” That’s how it works right?


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