Reminders

I was reminded today of a conversation I had a while ago with an ex.

Di: "ugh, I have to shave my legs again, they're getting gross."
Me: "I think you look great and I like you even if you don't shave"
Di: "Yeah, well you're a slacker and when you don't have for a few days it reminds me of fucking a wookiee."
Me: "Reminds you? At what point previously in your life were you kissing a wookiee?"
Di: "Shut up, you know what I mean."
Me: "No, I'm curious, at what point long, long ago were you transported to a galaxy far, far away and found yourself pub crawling on Kashyyyk?"
Di: "What?"
Me: "That's where wookiees are from."
Di: "Nerd. I'm using your shaving gel."
Me: "Only, if I can watch. I like your legs."
Di: "Seriously, who knows the planet wookiees are from?"
Me: "I'm just saying, you're like what, 5' 6"? The top of your head would barely come up to a wookiee's nipple."
Di: "I'm getting naked in the shower and you're still hung up on wookiees."

This is why I'm still single. God damn George Lucas