Reality: A Play In One Act

 LAW: The role of Congress isn't to adjudicate anything. It's a pro forma, procedural step because some idiots in the 1800's didn't get their shit done in time and Congress had to negotiate a compromise.

HAWLEY: But what if it wasn't?

REALITY: Look, I know you don't like the results, but those are the results. They've been certified by the states in question. Courts have rejected your dumbass lawsuits. It's over. You're not changing anything. This is just a ceremonial step.

HAWLEY: But what if it wasn't?

LAW: Even suing Mike Pence didn't work. If you're expecting this ridiculous stunt to do anything more than make you look ridiculous you're deluding yourself. Seriously man, the facts aren't on your side, the law isn't on your side, pounding the table and shouting loudly isn't going to help you here. That's not the role of Congress. Elections were held, the votes were counted and certified. That’s how it works.

HAWLEY: But what if it wasn't?

LAW: There's been no credible evidence of voter fraud anywhere near the level needed to flip the election. Georgia's officials even did a point by point rebuttal of the ridiculous claims on that (potentially indictable) Jan 2 call. This is simply an election that was held where your side lost. It's sad for you, but that's how elections go sometimes.

HAWLEY: But what if it wasn't?

REALITY:  In an election where the Republicans picked up House seats, a guy who didn’t win the popular vote the first time was caught up in a bunch of fraud, but it only effected the one guy and the other Republican election wins were totally valid? The only fraud here was directed at the Presidential race? It seems more than a little implausible to think that if you’re going to try to “rig” an election, you wouldn't take the legislative branch as well.

HAWLEY: But what if it wasn’t?

LAW: You realize that if this was within 1500 miles of a viable strategy, Biden would have done it after the 2016 election when he was still VP, right? It's delusional to think that everybody else who lost an election missed this loophole in democracy.

HAWLEY: But what if it wasn't?

LAW: …..

REALITY: You were dropped on the head repeatedly as a child, weren't you?

HAWLEY: But what if I wasn't?